Cracks in the System– Part Two – The Traged

By Frost McGahey, Investigative Journalist

(Editor's Note: Names have been changed for protection.)

In March of 2024, Steve shot himself. His story was one of failures of people and institutions.

Steve was a big man, 6'4" and weighed 300 lbs. His dementia symptoms included impaired thinking, anger, paranoia, and physical violence. Because of his illness, Kate, his stepdaughter, had taken his car keys so he couldn't drive his truck. Kate and her husband, Joe, went to visit Steve and their son who was living with Steve and caring for him. Upon arriving, their son met her outside the backdoor and told her that Steve was "very agitated because he could not find his keys." Kate goes in. 

As Joe waited outside, he began to worry about his wife. He entered the house. "I find Kate cowering in a corner with Steve towering over her demanding his keys so he can drive his truck to buy whiskey." Joe tried to calm Steve. During the conversation, Steve went to his room and retrieved a gun.

Joe saw this from the dining room. To protect his family, he entered the bedroom to calm Steve down. This took 20 minutes, and Steve finally placed the gun on the dresser. Joe did not confiscate it for fear of angering Steve again.

Joe spoke with a sheriff's deputy to see what could be done to protect Steve and his caregivers. The deputy asked why they hadn't taken the gun. Joe explained they didn't know how many guns were hidden in the house, and were afraid of taking his guns away in front of Steve. At that point, Steve never left the house even refusing to go to doctors' visits.

The deputy recommended the Drinkwaters call Adult Protective Services (APS). They called and filed a report. The case was assigned to an investigator who called back on Monday and made an appointment to come do an in-home assessment on Tuesday. That appointment would never take place.

On the same Monday, Joe called Fort Bayard Medical Center to explain the severity of the problem, and the family's desperate need for immediate care. They now tell him that they won't take Steve because he's a heavy drinker and would go into withdrawal. They explain, "their physician isn't capable of handling that type of patient". His level of drinking had been noted in February by FBMC home assessment nurse.

The family was instructed not to decrease the alcohol without a physician's guidance because it could trigger seizures "I asked them if there's any place I can take him to detox. They tell me they don't know of any such place," Joe said.

Other hospitals also contacted can't take a dementia patient who drank heavily, but Adult Protective Services knows of a Detox Center in Las Cruces. (It surprised the family that no hospital had mentioned the Detox Center.) APS told Joe to get a writ of involuntary commitment.

Joe called a local judge's office to ask about a writ of involuntary commitment. He was informed that the District Attorney would have to bring the writ to the court.

Next Joe called DA Renteria's office and explained the situation emphasizing it was a life and death matter for Steve and his caretakers. The secretary placed Joe on hold for 10 minutes, relaying the message to Renteria. Her response was that he was very concerned about the situation, but he had a full docket that day and would call them back the following morning.

On Tuesday, Kate and Joe visit Steve to tell him that Fort Bayard won't take him because of his drinking, and that he would need to spend eight weeks in a detox facility before being admitted to Fort Bayard.

The grandson was leaving in two weeks for a new job, and there was no one else to care for Steve. He became very agitated because the facility that he had planned on living in had denied him. Because of his dementia he believed his family was trying to "lock him up and steal his house and truck." 

Despite the reassurances of his family, Steve's anger escalated. Kate went to talk to the neighbors who had been helping keep an eye on Steve. Joe was still in the house when Steve got angrier, drank more, and retrieved his gun. Joe tried to calm him down.

Steve drained his whiskey bottle and went into the back room. A gunshot was heard. Joe retreated and called 911. "I'm a combat veteran. I know when I'm in danger of being shot," he said.

A second shot was heard. Steve had killed himself. Joe said, "I believe that if he could, Steve would have killed both me and Kate."

The sheriff's deputy arrived. He told Joe that the first shot was into the floor which happens often with suicides because they are testing the weapon. Later Joe and Kate find 13 guns hidden all over the house in kitchen drawers and laundry hampers. They believe that an attempt to confiscate guns from Steve could have resulted in the family being shot.

Michael Renteria never called the Drinkwaters back. Fort Bayard Medical Center explained their delay was due to a change-over in staffing.